There several reasons why what’s good for the goose is not always seen as being good for the gander. The attributes of a decision may be weighted differently when choosing for oneself compared to when giving advise. We present a simple model and some data suggesting that advice tends to focus on one prominent attribute, but choice for oneself tries to deal with tradeoffs. This is one explanation for why another’s choice seems so straightforward and simple (only one attribute is viewed as important) but one’s own choice seems so difficult (the tradeoffs create uncertainty about the decision).

Kray, L. & Gonzalez, R. (1999). Differential weighting in choice versus advice: I’ll do this, you do that.  Journal of Behavioral Decision Making, 12, 207-217. DOI: 10.1002/(SICI)1099-0771(199909)12:3<207::AID-BDM322>3.0.CO;2-P
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Abstract

We propose that when individuals make a decision for themselves they weight attributes more uniformly compared to when they give advice. In Study 1, 138 participants were given a hypothetical choice between two jobs varying on two dimensions and asked either to choose for themselves, offer advice to a best friend, or offer advice to an acquaintance. We hypothesized that respondents offering advice would favor the option with the higher value on the more important dimension. More participants in the acquaintance condition recommended the job with a higher value on the important dimension than participants making the choice for themselves. Study 2 (N = 62) tested the hypothesis in a situation where the options consisted of three dimensions. One option was relatively high on two of the three dimensions and the other option was relatively high on the remaining `socially important’, or `prominent’, dimension. The uniform weighting hypothesis for self-choice predicts higher frequency of choice for the former option. Data were consistent with this prediction. Study 3 (N = 170) tested the hypothesis in students’ choice of major at the university. We made use of an actual event, a pending university budget cut, that would require some students to change majors. Participants either made the decision for themselves, made a recommendation to a student in their same department, or made a recommendation to a student in another department facing the analogous dilemma. Replicating the findings of the first two studies, participants offering advice to a student in another department suggested staying with their current major significantly more than participants making the choice for themselves.